Talking To Myself

I have a friend who is fangirly about a lot of things and is very involved with various internet fan websites, discussions and fan fiction (especially the kind where male characters are in love with each other). And I hold none of that against her; it's not my kind of thing but it makes her happy. I'm just as big a fangirl about things as she is, I just express it differently.
What I do have a problem with is the fact that she refers to these internet communities as "fandom." That implies that fandom only consists of the people in these communities.
Everything in the world that can have fans, does. Everything. And everyone in the world is a fan of something. Therefore, the word "fandom" basically means "everybody in the world" but she doesn't use it that way. When she says it, she's only talking about the people in her internet communities and that kind of offends me. Just because I'm not involved in message boards and turning everybody gay doesn't make me not a fan.
To be perfectly honest, I don't really enjoy fan communities because (and this could just be my skewed perception) I feel like a lot of people try to turn it into a contest. Everyone seems to be convinced that they are the biggest fan and they're out to prove it. That's an attitude I first noticed at Mike Patton concerts and it seems fairly prominent on the internet. I'm not out to prove anything, I just love the things I love. And I've discovered I don't have much to say about the things I'm a fan of beyond "I love it, it's great," unless I'm talking about specific details (particular songs or episodes of a TV show, for instance).
But that's what my friends and this blog are for. I can tell my friends my ideas or write about them on this blog. Most of my friends don't like many of the same things I do and nobody reads this blog, so I'm essentially talking to myself (which is kind of lonely) but I don't have to worry about whether I win at loving a band or a movie or a television show.
(I should point out that I have encountered other fans online who really do just want to share their love of things with other people, no ego or competition involved. I like those people. Too bad I haven't encountered more of them.)
This is the problem with the internet: It perpetuates the already rampant misconception everybody has that they are the center of the universe. It's the problem that comes with being alive and never getting any time away from yourself: you tend to think you matter most. I'm guilty of it and you are too (and don't try to pretend like you're not; one of the symptoms of thinking you're the center of the universe is an "I'm not like that!" response to anything that sounds remotely negative).
The point is, the internet has made everybody all the more self centered. Facebook is a place where people go to assume everybody else cares what they have to say. Same goes for Twitter, any other "social network" websites I've missed, blogs and personal websites. Everybody has a voice on the internet, and everybody assumes their voice means something.
It doesn't. We're talking to nobody. Because we're not the center of the universe and nobody but ourselves care what we have to say.

Be seeing you.
-Sally